TW - apologism and some “what about teh menz?!” bullshit
Nope, it is clearly you who doesn’t understand so I’m going to attempt to explain. Firstly my posts come from victims. Everything here is people talking about their own experiences with rape culture - rape, assault, abuse, harassment, victim blaming, minimizing, apologism, etc. Not one single person has ever said anything about “all men” because they’re talking about their own personal experiences. It’s not my fault or their fault or anyone else’s fault that the vast majority of those stories include men as perpetrators. You know who’s fault that is? The men who made the choice to abuse. That’s it, that’s all there is to it. So if you’re going to get mad at anybody get mad at those people, the assholes out there choosing to abuse over and over and over again. They’re the problem. We are NOT the problem. All we are doing is talking about our experiences, sharing what we’ve been through. We have a right to do that and if you think simply sharing those stories gives all teh poor menz a bad name that is their fucking fault because they’re the ones abusing in all of these stories. If you want us to stop talking about what we’ve been through then spend your efforts trying to create a world where we don’t have any stories to tell, not yelling at people about how some men aren’t terrible. We know that not all men are terrible, we get that, and nobody cares about that fact because the fact that not all men are rapists doesn’t stop us all from continuously suffering from and being CONSTANTLY threatened with rape, sexual assault, sexual harassment, sexual abuse, and other forms of sexual and gender-based violence not to mention all the rape culture bullshit we deal with every fucking day like being blamed for the abuse other people perpetrate against us.
And even if there are people out there who take a lifetime of receiving abuse from men or the reality that men are damn near always the abusers and turn that into an inherent mistrust or even hatred of all men everywhere I have no problem with that. It’s not “horribly closed minded and misandrystic” it’s realistic. It’s realistic because that’s what happens when people are systematically abused over and over and over again by a singular class of people and then when that systematic abuse is institutionally protected. That’s what you get. That kind of mistrust, anger, and hatred is learned, we don’t start off that way. And you know how we learn it? We learn it by living in a world where 99.99999999% of ALL the abuse we suffer starting in CHILDHOOD before we’re even capable of understanding it is perpetrated by MEN. We learn it by hearing stories from other women about how 99.99999999% of all the abuse they’ve suffered is also at the hands of men. We learn it because that’s the reality of the world we live in which means that every single time we meet a new male person we’re forced to worry and wonder about whether or not he’s an abuser and since abusers are really good at hiding their true selves from us we have to be extra careful. We have the right to protect and defend ourselves and if that means fearing and/or hating all men everywhere, if that’s what protecting and defending ourselves takes then we have that right and for you to come here and demand that we care about teh poor menz fee fees is disgusting and simply furthering that abuse. If you want this all to stop then work towards creating a different world for us all to live in so that nobody ever feels the need to feel this way.
And finally, for the record, I have posted stories from people who’ve been abused by women and by men who’ve been abused. We already know that this happens and it’s already in the archives and if/when I find other such stories I always post them too because they’re relevant here. Again, it’s not my fault that the majority of abusers are men and the majority of victims and survivors are women. We will not silence ourselves for your comfort. We will not shut up so that men can feel better about themselves. We will not be silent until there is nothing left to tell.