Personal Experiences with Rape Culture

I WAS MOLESTED: And The Onlookers Stared And Laughed | Youth Ki Awaaz

Thu, 23 May 2013 20:21:54 -0400

I WAS MOLESTED: And The Onlookers Stared And Laughed | Youth Ki Awaaz:

During my struggle to reach the metro door, my top was pulled by a man to expose my breast for good 15 seconds while at the same time somebody grabbed my behind: A personal recount of the writer being molested in a Delhi metro

"The street harasser communicates to women that the street belongs to him, not her; that she is not..."

Thu, 23 May 2013 19:38:45 -0400

“The street harasser communicates to women that the street belongs to him, not her; that she is not free to go where she likes, when she likes; that if she behaves as though she is free, he will prove to her that the street is his by sexually violating her. Sexual harassment by “the man on the street” is so frequent in women’s lives that we have learned to see this behaviour as normal for men and inescapable for women.”

-
Dee Graham, Edna Rawlings & Roberta Rigsby. Loving to Survive: sexual terror, men’s violence, and women’s lives. NYU Press. July 1 1994. (p. 11 - 12)

bakerstreetmarauder: If someone tells you a racist, sexist or homophobic joke, don’t get mad at...

Thu, 23 May 2013 19:26:58 -0400

bakerstreetmarauder:

If someone tells you a racist, sexist or homophobic joke, don’t get mad at them. Just tell them you don’t get it. Keep telling them you don’t get it until they are forced to explain why women/minorities/homosexuals are stupid/etc.

Then just walk away.

"The most representative study of sexual violence and victimization among college students, and..."

Thu, 23 May 2013 19:20:49 -0400

“The most representative study of sexual violence and victimization among college students, and clearly the most extensive, was carried out by Koss, Gidycz and Wisniewski (1987). Their sample was comprised of 6159 students (3187 of which were women). Using questions that assess male sexual aggression and female victimization along a continuum of sexual violence, Koss et al found that 54 percent of the women students reported having experienced some form of sexual victimization. Koss et al interpreted these findings as lending support to A. Johnson’s (1980) observation, “That sexual violence is so pervasive supports the view that the locus of violence against women rests squarely in the middle of what our culture defines as ‘normal’ interaction between men and women” (p.146).”

-

Dee Graham, Edna Rawlings & Roberta Rigsby. Loving to Survive: sexual terror, men’s violence, and women’s lives. NYU Press. July 1 1994. (p. 16)

"At MacKinnon’s (1987) request, and based on a random selection of 930 San Francisco households,..."

Thu, 23 May 2013 18:53:53 -0400

“At MacKinnon’s (1987) request, and based on a random selection of 930 San Francisco households, Russell calculated the likelihood of a woman not being sexually assaulted or harassed in her lifetime. It was only 7.8 percent.”

-

Dee Graham, Edna Rawlings & Roberta Rigsby. Loving to Survive: sexual terror, men’s violence, and women’s lives. NYU Press. July 1 1994. (p. 16)

"Why is much of men’s aggression against women sexual in nature?ii Why wouldn’t men use the same kind..."

Thu, 23 May 2013 18:37:23 -0400

“Why is much of men’s aggression against women sexual in nature?ii Why wouldn’t men use the same kind of violence against women as they use against men? The answers may lie in patriarchy’s use of anatomical sex differences for determining individuals’ membership in oppressor and oppressed groups. That is, because we use individuals’ sex organs as the basis for discriminating membership in the oppressor group (male) and the oppressed group (female), males may direct violence and threats of violence against females’ sexual organs. (Jane Elliot, in The Eye of the Storm, demonstrates with third graders that virtually any dimension along which people can make discriminations, such as eye colour, is easily turned into grounds for creating oppressor and oppressed groups.) The purpose of such directed violence is to help ensure that female sexual organs are seen as subordinate and male sexual organs are seen as dominant. (Consider in this regard the fact that Sigmund Freud so strongly believed that the penis was superior that he based his whole psychology of women on this belief, arguing that women’s envy of the penis produced their heterosexuality. In addition, the label “castrating”, assigned to women whom men perceive as assuming too much power in their relationships with men, reveals a publicly recognized relationship between the penis and dominance.)”

-

Dee Graham, Edna Rawlings & Roberta Rigsby. Loving to Survive: sexual terror, men’s violence, and women’s lives. NYU Press. July 1 1994. (p. 19)

"Princeton University psychologist Susan Fiske took brain scans of heterosexual men while they looked..."

Thu, 23 May 2013 18:32:43 -0400

““Princeton University psychologist Susan Fiske took brain scans of heterosexual men while they looked at sexualised images of women wearing bikinis. She found that the part of their brains that became activated was pre-motor - areas that usually light up when people anticipate using tools. The men were reacting to the images as if the women were objects they were going to act on. Particularly shocking was the discovery that the participants who scored highest on tests of hostile sexism were those most likely to deactivate the part of the brain that considers other people’s intentions (the medial prefrontal cortex) while looking at the pictures. These men were responding to images of the women as if they were non-human.””

- The Equality Illusion (via lesilencieux)

jellybeing: predditor: TW: RAPE, MISOGYNY, TRANSPHOBIA,...

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:53:48 -0400

jellybeing:

predditor:

TW: RAPE, MISOGYNY, TRANSPHOBIA, VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN, SEXUAL ABUSE, ABUSE, ABLEISM, HOMOPHOBIA, RAPE PROMOTION

Reddit Refusing To Remove Popular Subpages That Promote Harmful Behavior

I’m writing in an attempt to bring awareness to a current petition going on trying to enforce Reddit to actually act on their own User Agreement and remove all their pages (subreddits) that do not follow these guidelines.

“You agree not to use any obscene, indecent or offensive language… [material must not be] defamatory, abusive, bullying, harassing, racist, hateful, or violent….further agree not to use any sexually suggestive language…” - taken from Reddits User Agreement

Unfortunately right now Reddit is ignoring their own rules and letting pages like the following exist with little to absolutely no moderation:

r/HotRapeStories

r/KillingWomen

r/SexyAbortions

r/RapingRetards

r/beatingwomen

r/BeatingFaggots

r/beatingtrannies

r/ChokeABitch

r/NecroPorn

r/BeatingCripples

r/BeatingNiggers

r/Nazi

/r/RapingWomen

These all exist on Reddit~ one of the most popular social networking sites that has had 34 MILLION UNIQUE VISITORS. Reddit gets around 1.8 billion page views every month. These subreddits are not that unknown either. If you go through the top subreddits on Reddit you will find almost every single one of these within the first 10-20 pages. This is simply something that everyone that uses Reddit, including their own moderating team, turn a blind eye too.

Recently one of the most popular subreddits on Reddit “creepshots” that was dedicated to users taking suggestive pictures of woman without their consent and putting it online without their knowledge was taken down. Users of this subreddit were known for posting pictures of underage girls, a teacher was even fired from taking pictures of his students and posting it on creepshots. This subreddit was deleted by the creator of creepshots because someone was blackmailing him and threatening to expose his identity. It was not taken down by Redditors moderators even after all the media backlash and arrests made that have come from Creepshots.

Related reading on the awfulness that existed in creepshots that was allowed to be there by Reddit if you are not convinced by my words alone:

Man drugs rapes sister in law and posts pictures of her on creepshots

Teacher posts pictures of students on creepshots

Example of an average underage girls photo posted on creepshots

Obviously, a lot of bad came from creepshots. Was this all really worth leaving it up for? Can we now learn from creepshots that getting like minded people talking about taking advantage of/raping/and even murdering is only going to lead to worse actions and encouragement of individuals to do harm to others.

for more examples of the TERRIBLE BEHAVIOR and related news articles about said behavior on these subreddits please visit: http://predditor.tumblr.com/

Please help spread the word and sign the petition here

im going to casually boost my reddit posts because we’re almost 500 signers away from the 10,000 goal!

tw: rape

Wed, 22 May 2013 20:51:33 -0400

commiekinkshamer:

i have no problem with pointing out that anyone of any gender can be an abuser, rapist, pedophile etc because that’s absolutely true.

but the problem with always emphasizing “yes but it happens to everyone, not just women (or people of colour, or trans* people, etc)!” is that it depoliticizes the issue.

violence is not an accident, it is reflective of social power relations that permeate society at every level

All About Male Privilege: tw abuse

Wed, 22 May 2013 20:38:31 -0400

All About Male Privilege: tw abuse:

dancethedarkaway:

livinginmiasma:

you-do-not-do:

hoelita:

people seriously think that you can just leave an abusive relationship, like walk out and it’s over

let’s talk about how one-third of women murdered every year are by an intimate partner. let’s talk about how a woman leaving her batterer is seventy-five percent more likely to be killed.

And it takes the average person at least 6 tries to leave an abusive relationship. Tries as in get up, pack your shit, walk out of the door and find somewhere else to stay. Not “I’m going to leave them this time”. It’s not easy to leave, but it is worth it.

Exactly. I packed my shit and fled at least a dozen times before I got out for good. And even after I’d moved back home with my parents, over 350 miles away, my ex waited until they went on holiday and then he turned up on my doorstep.

Followers, if you ever want to talk about domestic abuse, I am here for you. I will not judge you. I have been there and I understand.

-dance

to white women -- but you get to be beautiful + whole.

Wed, 22 May 2013 20:36:15 -0400

petitsirena:

when i look in the mirror and try to smooth the lumps rolling across my body, my friends say, “stop that! you have great curves! you fill things out!” and all i can wonder is, “why is it my burden to carry my confidence?”

how can you understand when you see your own face + body everywhere, on tv and in film, in magazines and every catalogue?

everywhere i look i’m told to hate myself and yet i’m chastised when i have a moment of weakness, criticized when i’m too vain.

i can’t perfect this balance of modest confidence and i shouldn’t have to, not when i already have to navigate the world as a woman of color. i’m not even allowed the freedom to express my full range of emotions — i’m supposed to present the right representation for my race. you’ve always been an individual first, race second.

but how am i supposed to do that when little white girls just like you used to say to me, “you could be a model if you weren’t short. or fat. or ugly.” the only thing they forgot to admit was white.

i hate having to reconcile being desired sexually because i’m asian and being aesthetically rejected for it all at the same time.

you think i should be flattered when i’m fetishized, but how can you mandate to me what encompasses “flattery” when no one has ever said to you : “wow, i love your swedish eyes” or “damn, i love white women” (though the opposite is constantly thought about women of color).

stopt telling me to feel beautiful, because when people tell me i’m beautiful they simultaneously remove my humanity. an asian beauty, never a beautiful woman.

you could never understand. you get to be beautiful and human, beautiful and whole.

Virginia GOP Nominee For Attorney General Would Force Women To Report Their Miscarriages To Police

Wed, 22 May 2013 18:33:05 -0400

Virginia GOP Nominee For Attorney General Would Force Women To Report Their Miscarriages To Police:

robot-heart-politics:

abaldwin360:

If a woman in Virginia has a miscarriage without a doctor present, they must report it within 24 hours to the police or risk going to jail for a full year. At least, that’s what would have happened if a bill introduced by Virginia state Sen. Mark Obenshain (R) had become law. And yet, the […]

*sigh*

Somewhere between 10% and 25% of pregnancies end in miscarriage. 1 in 4 people who can get pregnant will experience a miscarriage. A miscarriage is a completely normal, natural process that happens surprisingly frequently. Why on earth should it be reported to law enforcement, and how on earth does this not constitute gross government overreach into people’s private lives?

"In a study of a representative sample of women at least 18 years of age in the San Francisco area,..."

Wed, 22 May 2013 17:27:51 -0400

“In a study of a representative sample of women at least 18 years of age in the San Francisco area, Diana Russell (1982) found similar results: 14 percent of married women reported having been sexually assaulted by their husbands, whereas only half that many reported having been sexually assaulted by a stranger. These women perceived rape by their husbands as having more damaging, long-term effects than rape by strangers.”

-

Dee Graham, Edna Rawlings & Roberta Rigsby. Loving to Survive: sexual terror, men’s violence, and women’s lives. NYU Press. July 1 1994. (p. 8)

"Over the last decade, as companies chased after an effective chemical, there was fretting within the..."

Wed, 22 May 2013 16:25:32 -0400

“

Over the last decade, as companies chased after an effective chemical, there was fretting within the drug industry: what if, in trials, a medicine proved too effective? More than one adviser to the industry told me that companies worried about the prospect that their study results would be too strong, that the F.D.A. would reject an application out of concern that a chemical would lead to female excesses, crazed binges of infidelity, societal splintering.

“You want your effects to be good but not too good,” Andrew Goldstein, who is conducting the study in Washington, told me. “There was a lot of discussion about it by the experts in the room,” he said, recalling his involvement with the development of Flibanserin, “the need to show that you’re not turning women into nymphomaniacs.” He was still a bit stunned by the entrenched mores that lay within what he’d heard. “There’s a bias against — a fear of creating the sexually aggressive woman.”

”

- “Unexcited? There May Be a Pill for That.”—NYT

Gee, you ever think that might be part of the problem? That there’s a societally acceptable level of lady-boning?

(via ladonnapietra)

“good but not too good”

Yeah, go fuck yourself, dude.

(via whynotshesaid)

This article gave me fits for many reasons.

(via wut4)

i am so fucking angry at this

(via piddlebucket)

let me tell you how fucking angry this makes me as a woman who has been struggling with therapy for issues regarding my ability to enjoy sex. there could be something out there that would work for me, but maybe I can’t get it because some repressed, asshole fucking dudes decided that women enjoying and taking control of their libido’s and sexual needs would hurt society???

FUCK. YOU.

(via lagertha-lodbrok)

"Through a career that has included crotch-grabbing, nudity, BDSM, Marilyn Monroe fetishizing, and a..."

Wed, 22 May 2013 16:16:25 -0400

“Through a career that has included crotch-grabbing, nudity, BDSM, Marilyn Monroe fetishizing, and a 1992 book devoted to sex, Madonna has been viewed as a feminist provocateur, pushing the boundaries of acceptable femininity. But Beyoncé’s use of her body is criticized as thoughtless and without value beyond male titillation, providing a modern example of the age-old racist juxtaposition of animalistic black sexuality vs. controlled, intentional, and civilized white sexuality.”

- All Hail the Queen? (http://bitchmagazine.org/article/all-hail-the-queen-beyonce-feminism#.UZvUyP56MrU.facebook)

maisonmartinmargielous: there is literally nothing a man who I am not attracted to in any shape or...

Wed, 22 May 2013 00:51:15 -0400

maisonmartinmargielous:

there is literally nothing a man who I am not attracted to in any shape or form can do to make me want him

I hate this idea that there are tips and tricks to getting women like the fact that you have to essentially deceive and disguise yourself in order for someone to like you is sf scary and weird to me

it also reinforces the idea that when a woman says no she means convince me or continue to try different things

like wtf that’s scary and violent thinking

I see this shit perpetuated in so many narratives within movies, television it’s scary af

and there are men who think this shit is normal that scares me

pleasestopbeingsad: Street harassment is not a compliment.

Tue, 21 May 2013 22:23:19 -0400

pleasestopbeingsad:

Street harassment is not a compliment.

"To this end, we are calling on Facebook users to contact advertisers whose ads on Facebook appear..."

Tue, 21 May 2013 22:22:26 -0400

“To this end, we are calling on Facebook users to contact advertisers whose ads on Facebook appear next to content that targets women for violence, to ask these companies to withdraw from advertising on Facebook until you take the above actions to ban gender-based hate speech on your site.

Specifically, we are referring to groups, pages and images that explicitly condone or encourage rape or domestic violence or suggest that they are something to laugh or boast about. Pages currently appearing on Facebook include Fly Kicking Sluts in the Uterus, Kicking your Girlfriend in the Fanny because she won’t make you a Sandwich, Violently Raping Your Friend Just for Laughs, Raping your Girlfriend and many, many more. Images appearing on Facebook include photographs of women beaten, bruised, tied up, drugged, and bleeding, with captions such as “This bitch didn’t know when to shut up” and “Next time don’t get pregnant.”

These pages and images are approved by your moderators, while you regularly remove content such as pictures of women breastfeeding, women post-mastectomy and artistic representations of women’s bodies. In addition, women’s political speech, involving the use of their bodies in non-sexualized ways for protest, is regularly banned as pornographic, while pornographic content - prohibited by your own guidelines - remains. It appears that Facebook considers violence against women to be less offensive than non-violent images of women’s bodies, and that the only acceptable representation of women’s nudity are those in which women appear as sex objects or the victims of abuse. Your common practice of allowing this content by appending a [humor] disclaimer to said content literally treats violence targeting women as a joke.”

-
Soraya Chemaly: An Open Letter to Facebook (via brute-reason)

Most advertisers are stunned to hear that their ads are on these pages.
We have been at this for a year now with the Flush Rush effort and it is working. It can work on FB too.

(via tehbewilderness)

lexcanroar: so obviously this is funny because it’s so...

Tue, 21 May 2013 19:32:07 -0400

lexcanroar:

so obviously this is funny because it’s so ridiculous because this would basically never happen

and I can’t believe we live in a world where this scenario is so unlikely that it’s a joke

showmethesneer: Eartha Kitt slamming and shutting down street...

Tue, 21 May 2013 17:27:41 -0400

showmethesneer:

Eartha Kitt slamming and shutting down street harassment and objectification in Anna Lucasta (1958)